Short answer: I don’t know.
I do know that she if Hillary Clinton could kick her own backside for being stupid enough to use a private email server while she was Secretary of State, especially knowing that she would run for President again, she would. Oh my god, she would.
Those emails have been, not so much a thorn in her side, but a sledgehammer beating her over the head for her entire campaign. The Director of the FBI (a supposedly impartial role) James Comey attempted an outrageously transparent attempt to obliterate Hillary’s chances of being elected President. Only a week before the elections, Comey wrote a letter to Congress which somewhat sort of kind of did but didn’t implicate Hillary in even more questionable emails, linked to Anthony (oh my god go away) Weiner.
Just a couple of days before the election, Comey sent another letter to Congress telling them that there was no evidence in the emails to suggest Hillary had acted criminally and they would not be pursuing any charges against her. This was, of course, after much of the world that doesn’t view total corruption as anything but what it actually is, saw right through Comey’s bullshit obligation to notify Congress of potential findings in evidence not yet secured by a warrant linked to a Presidential freaking candidate just days before the election.
The sheer vile, narcissistic, degrading, racist, misogynistic, homophobic, anti-semitic, bigoted (the list goes on) campaign Donald Trump has run is nothing short of mind boggling. Think of it as the pro-Brexit campaign on acid. We’re talking outright lies and bigotry here from a man running to be the President of the most powerful country on earth. This man would have access to the country’s nuclear codes for god’s sake! Nuclear. Codes. Under Donald Trump’s commands. It sounds like a joke.
I am horrified by the fact this election is too damn close to call. It shouldn’t be. Hillary is the most qualified candidate of the two (I’m not even entertaining the independents because if they gave even the tiniest fuck about the country and not themselves, they would have pulled out of the race ages ago). She has lived and breathed politics for much of her life. She has made mistakes, my god has she made mistakes, but at least she knows what the hell the word “policy” means. At least she knows that the country needs putting back together again. At least she can see everyone, no matter their race, religion, gender, sexuality (more than we can say for Theresa May and Donald Trump). At least she knows that serving the needs of already privileged is not the job of a President.
Back in June, I was worried about Brexit. I never actually entertained the idea my fellow Brits would be stupid enough to vote us out of the EU. I took for granted that people recognised how privileged they were to be part of the EU. I took for granted the depths of hate people were capable of given the slightest opportunity for hatred. We had a literal murder of an MP, places of worship vandalised and hate crime is up at an alarming rate and it still continues. This tug of war. This constant fighting. This seemingly never ending feeling of instability, of never knowing what shoe will drop next.
So I am taking nothing for granted this time. 2016 is the year that has repeatedly kicked us all in the collective arse time and time again. Why should I believe it won’t just go ahead and gut us all one last time by electing the biggest joke Presidential candidate we have ever seen.
Frankly, I’m not holding my breath the U.S. can do this.
I hope, that come tomorrow, when the result is clear, we can all take a big breath together. And when the new President is sworn in in January 2017, we will all feel like everything will be ok and that 2016 was just a blip we can all start to try to fix.
Because the alternative doesn’t even bear thinking about.